Photo Essay Reflection

   The content of my Photo Essay assignment is heavy. Extremely so. As a society, it's difficult for us to talk about domestic abuse and sexual assault. Imagine, then, attempting to find women to pose with bare shoulders and black paint, exposing those very issues. It was so hard to find models, that I ended up taking self portraits for the most sensitive photos I wanted to take (my screaming photos). Taking, editing and compiling the photos was emotionally exhausting. The photos are haunting and bare, just as I had wanted them to be.

   Due to the strong nature of the photographs in my Photo Essay, it was strangely difficult for me to find the words to accompany the piece. I am both a writer and a photographer, but have never done a project that requires me to utilize both. As you can see through my rough drafts, I was struggling with my essay. It seemed that everything I tried to say was forced. My photographs seemed so stark and bold, with black and white and heavy subjects. My words were dirtying the photographs, filling in the shadows with dramatic flares I knew didn't belong. I wrote and re-wrote the essay at least forty times, erasing and cutting pieces until I was left with a blank slate over and over again.

   I knew the statistics I had added to the video explained the idea behind the photos and the song I chose only added to the emotional pull of the subjects. Every time I watched the video, I kept thinking back to a poem I had written in early 2013. I had written the poem based on my own experiences with domestic abuse and sexual assault, with much the same idea in mind that I had approached this project with. When writing the poem, it had seemed completely out of character. It was simple, blunt and bare, unlike much of the writing I had done up to that point. The nature of my photographs and my poem seemed to go hand-in-hand.

   I believe my decision to delete the essay portion of my writing and instead leave only a poem beneath the video was the right one. Since my final draft, I have watched the video and read the poem several times and feel the piece to be complete. I hope that the people who have looked at my Photo Essay feel the same way I do. If not... too bad.